Day to Day Living

Some time ago I received a survey form containing the following:

I was looking for info unrelated but being a clinical psychologist was intrigued by the item in your family tree. I guess I'm only commenting here to voice support for your courage and convictions.

Maybe a little disclosure about what it means to be normal and happy on a day to day basis and be gender dysphoric/gender re-assigned would help some people with the light at the end of their tunnels.

When I posted that message I wrote “Time permitting, I will begin reorganizing and rewriting (meaning clarifying my thoughts) the existing pages at this web site while adding new pages. However, please understand this process will not be accomplished quickly. I have not had time to even open and work with the family tree (genealogy) information mentioned above in several months.”

I recently dropped my extra, volunteer jobs as a writer for the local county genealogical and historical society’s monthly publication and as review editor for the quarterly publication of the Association of Professional Genealogists. I have finished, at least for the moment, the beta testing of three genealogical applications that are now being marketed. I do have two active classes with the National Institute for Genealogical Studies online, yet do not begin this term’s project management classes with the University of California at Santa Cruz – Extension for another couple of weeks. Finally, the eight technical manuals (print and online help) upon which I have been working the past year, half for new products as the products were developing, are now finished. Now, I can begin the other technical publications needing to be designed and written with the product managers pleading “Denise, can you now work on my new product manuals? I need both for the trade show in six weeks.”

Day to day living? I hope the above paragraph describes partially what I experience both in business and personal. I am busy with normal (?) activities. At least these activities are normal for me. I am active with what I enjoy doing. I am busy with my life; a life that to me has meaning and rewards. I write ‘rewards’ because my life and my accomplishments are mine. That life is not dictated by other than me, or the normal forces one experiences when interacting with other people in our society. I am simply - ME.

Being perceived as the incorrect gender is disastrous. Transition is frequently filled with difficulties, perhaps abandonment, misunderstanding, or worse. Yet as I have written elsewhere this is the time you must have faith in yourself. While the path of transition is difficult, if you have faith in and understanding of yourself you will succeed.

Once you have trod the path of transition to its end, you are still not finished. What your life will be beyond that point is up to you. Never give up upon yourself, or your respect for yourself. If you need to continue fighting society and the misconceptions of that society just to exist, do so! This is your life!

ADDENDUM -- Since the above was written, day-to-day life has picked up. Allison and I have begun looking toward eventual retirement. Not sitting around however. Late June 2004 we began our own business - New Moon Alpacas. Yup! Our retirement will mean moving to a ranch and raising our growing herd of alpacas. We are attending alpaca shows, participating in both halter and fiber competitions. And yes, more and more other alpaca ranchers are learning I am transgendered.

You are visitor to arrive at this page since September 2, 2003.

Copyright © 2003-2005 Denise L. Moss-Fritch. All rights reserved.
Revised: December 31, 2004 12:23:52 PM -0800.